I was over the Democrats’ act. The mindless rage at everyone to the right of Mao was becoming tiresome; especially considering it was fueled by hate, ignorance and outright baloney. “The NRA is a terrorist organization!” “Border security is racist!” “Blame the white guy!” Rather than examine their internal workings and possibly come up with a message that didn’t involve expressing complete disdain for at least half the country, they curled up, ever-tighter, into a seething ball of political fury. They blew every nickel of political capital they ever earned on keeping Hillary Clinton’s political fantasies on life support and were falling apart like whatever is left of former President Barack Obama’s dwindling legacy. I’ve already seen them try to sway the electorate by telling them they hate them more than cancer. Zzzzz.
But man, have they ever come through of late! In the opening weeks of what far-left blogger and feminist priestess Rebecca Traister has termed the left’s “summer of rage,” they have turned on each other like starving rats, and I am so here for their latest freakshow. As bored as I was of listening to liberals throw unholy tantrums and shrieking about whatever weird conspiracy theory they’d cooked up to explain why President Donald Trump has mopped the floor with them since January 2017, I am riveted by watching them jockey for position to throw each other under the bus.
Last week, a hitherto-unknown communist named Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez yanked the rug out from under longtime congressman — and Nancy Pelosi sock puppet — Joe Crowley (D-Not for long). And Crowley isn’t some background benchwarmer from some hippie-infested Oregon backwater or gun violence-plagued free-fire zone in urban Baltimore. Crowley is the fourth-ranking Democrat in the House of Representatives. Moreover, Ocasio-Cortez isn’t some Democrat super-pac-backed lecture circuit darling. She’s a communist bartender. A 28-year-old communist bartender. In the space of a week, Miss Ocasio-Cortez has jumped from undereducated neophyte to the new face of the Democrat Party; a fact which doubtless galls Madame Pelosi as much as a Botox® shortage. And God love the girl; in a district in which Republicans are about as popular as the plague, she’s probably going to win. The next generation of the party of Hillary Clinton is younger than Hillary’s own kid, and wants every American to taste the sweet fruit of socialism. Of course, that would be a metaphorical taste, since the grocery stores in socialist nations ran out of fruit a couple of years ago.
Bookending the “new” left with Ocasio-Cortez, is Congressperson Maxine Waters (LOL-Californistan). Don’t let her advanced years fool you. Our gal Max might look like a raisin in a James Brown wig next to the vivacious Ocasio-Cortez, but she can rock her own pair of crazypants. After exhorting liberals to go full stormtrooper whenever they encounter enemies of the collective, she followed up with some fanciful tales about death threats, and then turned both barrels on her party’s hierarchy. This past weekend, the old girl took dead aim at both Pelosi and Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer (D-Wherever There’s a Camera), telling MSNBC’s resident racist Joy Ann Reid that her party’s bigwigs “will do anything that they think is necessary to protect their leadership.”
Time was, you were allowed to be a fairly moderate Democrat. They even permitted the occasional pro-life politician into their ranks, as long as the pol would pull the “yes” lever on whatever tax scam or welfare giveaway they came up with. Now, they’re even going after Senator Bernie Sanders (Crazy Old Man – VT). Everyone’s favorite grumpy old socialist just two short years ago, Bernie’s refusal to endorse abolishing the ICE has him looking at the business end of the same ideologues who squealed like fangirls for him when he challenged Hillary for the title.
One of my best friends, and a smart cat in his own right, has long maintained that the Democrats, when starving for a win, inevitably start eating their own. Based on their current diet, I’d say he’s right. I’d also say: Dig in, Democrats!
— Ben Crystal