Avenatti client: I’m pursuing assault charges against Tucker Carlson over incident at country club last month

My headline is a solid entry in the “2018 Political Mad Libs” genre, I think. If only there were a Michael Cohen angle or something about Kanye West it’d be perfect.

The best part of this new clusterfark is Avenatti’s repeated tongue-clucking on Twitter about the possibility of Tucker’s underaged daughter drinking alcohol at the country club. She’s 19; she was there having dinner with her dad and brother; if in fact she was drinking instead of just fetching drinks from the bar for dad she was doing so with full parental consent. Imagine being so much of a petty dick that you’d hassle a guy for letting his over-18 child have wine or whatever with a meal in his presence. He must really be pissed about that “creepy porn lawyer” thing.

Tucker posted this on Twitter over the weekend, soon after Avenatti began tweeting about the incident:

If there’s one thing we learned from the Kavanaugh saga, it’s that you should take Avenatti clients leveling thin accusations of serious offenses against left-wing hate objects very seriously. Here’s the response to Tucker from his new client, Juan Manuel Granados:

Note that Carlson’s daughter’s drinking is mentioned again. The video of the incident posted by Avenatti over the weekend and embedded below is also curiously light on explanations for the spat. Whether this is the entirety of the footage or just the part most favorable to Granados, only the participants know. It starts with Tucker hopping mad, to the point of profanity, then the bald guy grabs (what I assume to be) Granados by the shirt at 22 seconds in.

What happened to make these damned right-wing neanderthals so angry? The video conveniently doesn’t answer that question, although it’s interesting that Carlson claims in his statement that Granados’s membership at the country club has since been revoked and Granados doesn’t deny it. Granados’s statement also doesn’t explain why the confrontation between him and the Carlsons started. It implies that they set upon him randomly because he’s gay and Latino, which is goofy on the merits but makes sense in context once you know that (a) Avenatti is representing him and (b) Avenatti is using this incident the same way he used the Julie Swetnick matter, to polish up his brand as a white knight who’ll joust with their least favorite political actors. An incident where Granados picked a fight with Carlson’s daughter by insulting her and/or her did is unhelpful. An incident in which Carlson is yelling at a gay Latino for reasons unknown to leave his country club is much better.

In fact, here’s how Avenatti described what happened in his very first tweet about it on Saturday:

Silver lining: There’s no worse than a 60-70 percent chance that this will backfire on Avenatti like the Swetnick matter did when witnesses end up siding with the accused rather than the accuser. That might damage him enough among liberals that American politics will finally be rid of him. At least until the Stormygate lawsuit picks up again.